But at the same time he was a nice person and great to talk to if This is my circus these are my Monkeys shirt could get used to the abuse. He liked to tell you how great he is and insinuate what a nothing you are. But he was also very generous. I never asked him for a penny but he would let you borrow anything he had if he trusted you to return it and was eager to give advice. I was so shocked I didnt know how to react. His wife looked horrified and I didnt want to walk out on the dinner she had prepared. Everyone acted like it didnt happen and dinner was fine but when we got home he called insinuating that my daughter had stolen something because they couldnt find it. First you ask yourself why you can’t accept this child simply as a child who, in all probability wants and needs the type of love a grandmother can give. Do you dislike her parent and is that coloring your feeling towards the child, or is it just that the child is different in interests from what you’re used to. I do understand the need to not separate the children so that one set gets your attention and time, and maybe gifts too? They are forming a new family, and to give attention to only some and not to others is so wrong. If the situation was reversed and it was the other mother in law who wanted your grandchildren excluded you’d hit the roof. Rightfully so. Keep that in mind, and don’t push this idea that you can do for some, but not for others, that’s a path that will eventually end with no one wanting to visit grandma.